On the radio Monday, a pastor talked about a confession from a parishioner. Several years before, the man’s wife died. He remarried but soon found that he was still in love with his deceased wife. He confessed that after many years of marriage, he didn’t love his current wife. It was affecting his current marriage.
The pastor’s advice was that he confess to his wife that he didn’t love her, was still in love with his deceased wife, but ask that the two live together as friends.
My mind immediate raced to Genesis 2:24, A man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. When God joins a man and a woman together, no other relationship – not even with family – is to come between them. The husband-wife relationship is the most intimate, close, abiding, tender and true relationship any two humans can experience … at least that’s God’s design. No one likes to be loved second-place. No one likes to be the booby-prize in a relationship.
Some people are confused when the Bible records God saying, You shall worship no other god, for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God (Exodus 34:14). The next two verses explain why. Second-hand love is no love at all, for the God of Israel deserves full devotion from His people. He is jealous to be loved fully by the one whom He loves.
If God loves you – don’t make your love for Him second-hand leftovers from a divided heart.